The two lives of me.

There was a girl I once knew, I still remember her, because of her opaque faith in love and happiness. She found the silver lining in the darkest of the clouds, while running she knew she should sit and cherish her life and she accepted that the ultimate reason for being alive was the pursuit of happiness.
If you looked outside from your room, you would see her, walking past on quiet days with a smile on her face and a certain aura around her. For people who didn’t know her, she could seem pretentious, but boy, because I knew her, I knew how vulnerable she was, intentionally so.
She believed that vulnerability made life worth living and that building quality relationships was the one thing she should invest her time in. And then there it was, she fell in love. If music is the silence between the notes, that love affair was the quietness and calm in her life that she needed to bring stability and tranquility to her.
Distance between the lovers grew, the time difference brought its own differences, but the love did not fade away. They had sworn that it wouldn’t, even if it meant they did not have to be together, they would want to be a part of each other’s heart, for as long as they could.
She started losing that bond with happiness though, it struck her, how dramatically different her life was, on the other side of the planet. At home, she used to be this quiet girl, bottling up her feelings, hiding from emotions and leading life the ignorant way.
The three years she spent away from home, were the best years of her life, not because of any other reason but because of how she found herself. Someone told her, that you could measure the love you have for yourself by realizing how capable you are of loving someone else. She knew that she had loved herself so deeply for the last 17 months, that now, at home, everything would be different. No more bottling up feelings, no more settling for the ordinary life- for she had found herself, she was ready to explore life and conquer the world.
However, she might have transformed into this beautiful human being, willing to live life in its full glory, the people she left behind, are still how she left them. She sits by herself, to question their ignorance, their lack of personal development and if she made the right choice by returning.
That girl is me.