The situation inside

Damage.
You wake up, everything is going wrong, nothing gets better, you go back to sleep, promising yourself that tomorrow you’ll try harder. There are so many things you want to do, there are so many things bottling up inside, they are catalysts for the explosion. You explode because you’re angry, because you’re angry all the time. Even as you say those words, you realize that you shouldn’t be saying them, but you say them anyway, what got you here?

Ultimate freedom, intense love, heart full of dreams compared to no freedom, no love and blaring meteorites of dreams, that can’t stay in your heart anymore; they want to fill the void but it’s taking longer than usual. It just takes too fucking long for everything.

Patience.

You preach about it, you know you are patient, but you have bad days too. Knowing you have been damaged doesn’t help. Willing to throw yourself at anyone who shows a bit of appreciation, that doesn’t speak highly of self-esteem anyway. You try to do new things, just keep doing new things, you’ll have experiences, you’ll make memories, and even before you know it, you would’ve moved on.

Promises.
You promised yourself, that you were gonna respect and celebrate every minute of being alive. But that’s hard to do, if you don’t get to do it the way you want to. Inside you know that you treasure it, you respect it, but it’s just not working out right now.

Life goes on.