when i was little, i thought the milk churns outside the fields bringing milk for the cows to drink (i am from london, i do have to be excused from much knowledge of the real world)

but if you watch this film - an animation called barnyard - you have to accept the fact that cows - with udders - can be male.

there is a very surreal scene at the end where a lady cow gives birth. she lies under a blanket watched by a barn full of animals. she breathes out once. then you see the baby cow lifted up by the midwife cow. she says 'it's a boy' my head is shouting 'how do you know?'

lots of jobs done today. lists ticked. applications sent off - i am deluded in thinking that i have a good chance but you never know. beds made for impending grandparents. dinner smells wafting about the house. should feel like domestic godess. instead feel like surfing channel4 website to find out about big brother (oh the shame, the shame)