Confession Of A Sausage Smuggler

My name is Peter and I smuggled sausage into Germany.

Not just any old sausage but this type of sausage. Variously known as Lorne Sausage, Square Sausage, Sausage Slice or, my favourite, Dundee Steak, this type of sausage is unknown here in Germany.

I pretty much survived on it as a student - our local butcher sold it and you could get 3lbs (about a kilo and a half) for a £1. That was about all I ate for 6 months. That and Weetabix.

It was not the Diet Of Champions.

Still, I have retained a fondness for it and I'll be interested in the reaction it gets when it's served up for tomorrow's breakfast alongside one of Crombies Of Edinburgh's finest One O' Clock Bangers and a couple of thick rashers of back bacon (another thing that doesn't exist here).

Muffins will be toasted and tea will be served. It will be a Breakfast to Remember.