Squalor and smoke's not your style,

I don't like this place, we'd better go...

Mood today: calm. Still. Calmer than I have been in a while. I got home, sat down, ate my dinner and just stopped and realised how serene I felt. Mark at work had just finished reading Slaughterhouse Five on my recommendation and we were talking about it- and about his interpretation of it- which I have to admit is very convincing, so I had Vonnegut on the brain while I was sitting with Dad, and was reminded of his often-quoted phrase:
"I urge you to please notice when you are happy, and exclaim or murmur or think at some point, 'If this isn't nice, I don't know what is."

Kurt Vonnegut had this delightful way of phrasing his thoughts. And it seems like every single one of those thoughts had something at once insightful, comforting and dismal to say about existence.

Almost cold, but not, because I'm feeling warmer now. It's actually been a mixed bag today. I hope this isn't resignation. It doesn't feel like resignation. I am annoyed, at work, for three of the best guys I know who are getting a raw deal and who give me three very good reasons for coming into work in the morning - a truth that could very well be short lived after today.*

So there's that.

I did get a text on the bus home that made me very happy. It assured me that a happy medium status quo I was very sad to see change might be re-balanced. Or possibly wasn't lost to begin with.

Last night was fun, although an apt reminder of why alcohol is the enemy. Alex and I had a greasy Wetherspoons lunch to make up for it today. Dream team tomorrow. Genuinely dreading yeh end of the shift as much as I am looking forward to it. It's good to have people around who make you dread the fall of night. Better than anticipating it.

Oh. And this: "There are plenty of good reasons for fighting, but no good reason ever to hate without reservation, to imagine that God Almighty Himself hates with you, too."



*(And I'll be hearing about/getting a few slaps in the face, and having a little epiphany, retrospectively, at a session on Wednesday and a sushi lunch on Thursday...)