Nouvelle cuisine!

Working in a wee school & got made a school dinner! Euuch, is that what they feed kids now. First came a heap of broccoli , whoever invented that stuff had a twisted mind, next came a load of carrots (hate them with a passion), lettuce (rabbit food) tomato all the while I'm thinking is there any real food going to arrive on this plate! Next she splats something akin to a cow pat on my plate! "what's that" I said in trepidation! "beef burger" grunted the disgruntled dinner lady. Why do dinner ladies look like Methusla! with more lines on their faces than an AA road map! That object had never been beef in any previous incarnation !
Then the chucked some flat orange thing in my direction, my raised eyebrows gave the response "cheese" "Is there any salt" I ventured "salt? we aren't allowed salt in the building. Since when did salt become a grade A drug! For pudding it was a carton of yogurt with more E numbers than letters in the Chinese alphabet!
No wonders today's generation X kids have all manner of problems with that crap they pump into them in the name of health! If I worked full time in this place I could lose a whole heap of weight. I off to look for some chocolate!