X marks the spot

Snook into the verboten woods this morning, met an old lady who admitted, guiltily that she was there on a mushroom hunt, but due to the felled trees she couldn't get through to her secret pilzpatch.

I'm working on corrupting Germans, introduced a couple to the joys of Top Gear, specifically the episode where they attempt to jump a Volvo estate car over as many caravans as possible, well why not?