The end is nigh

The fuchsia's drowning in the bee bath, petunia's flapping about like a drunken sailor. And the daisies?!! Dear oh dear! It's all gone sideways the past few days.

Still, the asters are due any day.

Actually, I swore off petunias a few years ago, despite the fact they're so reliable and add a flourish of colour in the blank spots. But, you see, I was sat in the kitchen listening to a gardening programme on the radio back then, I was. (I know, sounds a bit crazy, but I actually was. Gardening programmes are good. Same timbre as cricket on the radio).

Anyway, there I was, listening to an interview with a master gardener from the northern hemisphere and MAKING NOTES(!!), so I was.

Oh god! What hadn't she grown in her garden! And she gave away all the tips too! For an hour I was otherwise engaged with my radio.

Then just at the end of the programme the guy says to the master gardener, "Well! Your garden DOES sound magnificent!", and she says, "Well let's just say, I don't bother with petunias".

!!! !!

I wilted.

Never mind, though. I've bounced back since!