I Am Like A Hoor On A Honda

Bitch really should be spelled with an ISP in it......
Oxford Dictionary, please take note...

Oh Sweet Jeebus, I feel a heap of rants coming on....

So far, this week, I have spent approx. FOUR HOURS on the phone to my ISP's "Helpline" in Bombay....

Get the pencil out and lick it, O.D., Im only just starting...

"Helpline...an intercontinental oxymoron, prone to confusion, frustration, and furious cranial abuse contra the most proximate vertical brick structure...."

Now, heres a thing...I, as a Settled Wicklovian, have trouble making head nor tail of my fellow countypeoples garbled speech.
What shaggin hope a Bombavian, then, trying to decipher MY guttural, semi-drunken pleas for technical assistance?
Can you IMAGINE?????????

On the ball, there, Oxford Dick? Here we go again....

"ISP.....Internationally Selling PANTS!!!!!! or A spurious Company which spends more on groovy advertising than network maintenance or upgrading. A Lying Piece of Shit. A Money Pit. Prone to statements such as "98% coverage@7.8MBPS"

A Liver Fluke is also prone to 98% coverage, in Cowshit, and then also proceeds to wreak havoc and misery among the herd.

Rant Over.

Back to the Blip....

This is Natalia, my Partner in Grime today....
All the way from Uruguay (did I spell that right and proper, O.D.?)
She is the Michaelangelo Of The Market, crafting beautiful displays from base vegetables.
She even made a penguin, today, from a semi-shagged aubergine...
Crossed the Atlantic for love, but she dumped her, eventually...
I understand her Engrish even less than my countymates, but she is a joy to work with.....

And she never drops the hand...

All Good, eh?