Lego Saga Part Whatever

You may recall before my little trip to kitchen wonderland last week we were following the adventures of Tim and Sidney who were looking to start a punk band. Last time we met young Sidney had just been arrested by Chief Wiggum with ninja swords and Tim had just teamed up with The Stig to reveal his true identity. In todays exciting episode we just drop The Stig storyline completely and meet up with Tim as he ponders life without Sidney.... or does he?

Sidney: Alright Tim

Life without Sidney lasted one Northampton based episode. I knew that was coming and I guess by now you probably did as well. Suspense isn't easy in a lego photo blog

Tim: Dare I ask?

Sidney: To 'cut' a long story short it appears that two ninja swords are no match for a punk with an axe.

Tim: So you beheaded a man of the law? That's a bit ropey given all the tragic events in real life.

Sidney: I agree. In real life the awful executions of captured soldiers is a travesty upon human decency and a stain on mankind as a whole. However in this little skit I have simply removed the head of a fictional lego character in order to play out the charade of getting the saxophone back, which indicdentally is over there on the floor just out of crop.

Tim: riiiight. Do you think this is one of those episodes where you'd cancel it and replace it with a repeat of 'Goodnight, Sweetheart' or something? Like when there's a train crash on the Bill and it happens in real life the same day?

Sidney: No we're not watched by millions, we average 37 views and the only people watching ae Brian, his other half and of course Annie. Incidentally when was the last time you watched any TV? What the hell is The Bill? As for Goodnight Sweetheart you've lost me.

Tim: They were both good solid entertaining programmes, always a fresh and original episode to watch. However as they didn't gain a true cult following they've not be replayed to death. The Bill launched Mark Wingett to superstardom after he failed to really capitalise on his role in Quadrophenia.

Sidney: I'm still holding Chief Wiggums head..... I sense you're heading into a rant.....

Tim: Nowadays of course you dn't get as much good, original television shows. Every drama is a bloody period drama, theres no good honest 'bent cop beats up baddies' type show. remember Burnside from the Bill? He kicked arse and got results and by god he did it by playing outside of the rules. I know the one with the lugholes from Only Fool and Horses didn't exactly tear up 1944 war time London, but he was a success with the Ladies back then. I always wondered if they'd do an episode where he found her in 1990s London and she was all wrinkly and old and he tapped her anyway for old times sake? Did that episode ever happen?

Sidney: I don't know Timothy.

Tim: Well it should have.

Sidney: Should haveor should of?

Tim: Sidney I'll tell you this once and I will tell you it only once. Anyone who replaces the word 'have' with the word 'of'' is committing an atrocity on the English language and deserves to have their keyboards fingers glued together so they can commit it no more.

Sidney: I would of thought that sounded harsh.

So there we have it. Sidney has escaped the short arm of the (Simpsons) law and is back to terrorise Tim with his bad grammar. Tomorrow the band have their first rehearsal scheduled. How will that go?

Who knows?

Who cares?