Sacre Bleu!

Blow the Whistle! I've nae finger nails left! How long to go? Fuck!

When I arrived at the Cask & Barrel on Broughton Street we'd been delayed. Couldnae get in the door. I was with Uncle Mike - 71, deaf, large, been in Oz too long. I was the probe. My groin had never seen so much action. Rubbed against the leg of more people than the rest of my previous life. I thought "fuck it - let's get 4 pints while I'm here" - 1 Borders each and 1 IPA each. 1st half over - job done. Fletcher off. Some drinkers spilled outside the pub. More booze for us. My we bro and chick join us. Second half. Scotland look better and start strong. 20 minutes in - GOAL! - sorry - WHAT A FUCKING GOAL! - Everyone was soaked with flying bevvy. 71-year-old Uncle is jumpin aboot like a lunatic. For the next 28 minutes nobody takes their eyes off the big tv. Alomst everyone needs a piss - but you cannae miss this (or get anywhere near the bog). The boys are super-strong and even have forays up the other end of the park. The ref adds 3 minutes at the end - 30 seconds for the Scotland goal and 2.5 minutes for....eh....only he knows. French boys take their theatrical dives. I often wonder - do they practice that in training, like penalties, for a half-hour at the end of the session? No joy for them. The whistle blows and there's more delirium now than when the goal went in.

The superlatives Uncle Mike used were hilarious. Let's just say he was very glad he experienced this. He's over for a school reunion among other dates and this topped it all off.

Some figures - first time we've beaten the French on their turf in 57 years. First time we've beaten them in 18 years. We'd have been 5 games without conceding for the first time since ......well I dunno.....but if that wee Jambo scumbag hadnae dived at Hampden on Saturday it'd have been 23 years since we went 4 without conceding.


Man of the match is difficult - it was a group thang and all that. The papers were....inconsistent. Hutton was a revelation. Hartley and Ferguson (this hurts) were good. Two fellas that have basically made the "New Scotland" are Celtic's Brown and McManus. Faddy's goal - wow! It pains me to say it but the lanky Jambo-fan in goal made the most crucial impacts in the match and, for me, Gordon edges out McManus for man-of-the-match.


And on the eighth day Faddy created Go(l)d.