Tales from the Old Mills

By Oldmills

Bessing About

....spent the calm post-dawn hour, which shortens rapidly this time of year, wandering blearily but life-sated along the premier and leaf-dappled main boulevard of Blessington, a quaint hamlet possessing both charm and menace in equal buckets. The domociliary visages radiate an eery calm and, at the same time, an unknowing, perhaps historical, antagonism, towards nothing in particular, but paranoia and previous experience in other poverty-raddled sinkholes have given me a (divine-gifted sense of?) the insanely neurotic everyday casual violence of the common Irish ......
It was 7 am of a Sunday morning, and the local sibins (shebeens, or unlicenced pubs), had just disgorged their passengers on the Famine Train To Hell Or Connaught (a local expression, seemingly, but beyond my ken as an impartial Kul-Shee, as the local argot has it), and I spotted this partiular "icon des pays" (an aside- when I employed this phrase in parlay with the native, he toothlessly laughed, brightening the dawn even further,,,,,,,and said, "Yis don geddit, yiz puffy fkin Sassenach cnt, I CON, THEYS PAYS!!!!!!HAHAHAHAHA.....and so on id infantium)
..but I digress, as I shouldnt, but proceeded to crab-step around certain faecal matter to advantagion the light descending, the better to illumine the disparity between the obvious intelligence of the street-sitter, and the morbid anachronistic fetish he carried everywhere with him, according to his frankly primitive but truly heartwarming narrative....

"Sheela na Gig..Sheela na Gick....SHEELA NA GIG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
he roared, ignoring the strictly held Sabbath Silence rule that blankets Catholic South Ireland every weekend...

"Like EVERY Irish Young Wan of a Sahurday Night, she Spreads Her Legs For All And Sunday......"

I would like to thank, indeed, all and sundry, for your kind and sometimes puzzling messages about my lately departed atheistic millionairess mother.....
@ Nic, O? Teen....what do you mean when you say that "one can serve God and Mammon, but you surely cant serve Cod and Gammon??"- Wank.

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