It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Xmas

Need bookends for your biggest books? Skeletal deer for your miles of blinking lights? A boar for your parties? (I bet your uncle Phil already has that spot taken.) How about an oversized ram? Or a lot of bull? Something grizzly from Alaska? (Sarah Palin fills in there.) I have the place to get your stocking stuffers. You only have a few more days. And what says "I love you, Merry Xmas" more than a huge cock or two? American Express not accepted, but will do oversees shipping for those Scots or Welsh with taste.

Make it bigger if you can control your excitement.