Big sky in little Morningside

Oh Morningside! With your wallet-shagging Waitrose and your thrift-buggering Marks and Sparks.

Hahahahaha! Greetings underlings! Who wants to pay £4.50 for a frozen pizza?

Me! Me! A hundred times me, oh Master of Morningside!

Hahahahahahaha! Wonderful! Do you want £1.50 worth of mango with that?

Do I! Sweet lord yes! How much mango does that buy, sir?

Hahahahaha! Just the one, my tiny little Morningsider!

That doesn't sound like a lot of mango. Is it a magical mango, sweet sir?

Hahahahahaha! Magical? Magical! Is it magical?...............
.....................................................................................eh.... well no, not really.

I'll take one, kind and caring Master of Morningside.

Hahahahaha! Excellent! Why not take two, little tiny puny Morningsider.

Two? Is there a magical mango deal on? How much will two cost?

Hahahahahahaha! A surprisingly magical £3!

Oh thank you, sweet and lovely Master of Morningside. I'm sooooo grateful!

Hahahahahaha! Of course you are, my tiny little monkey. Now move along.


Waitrose and M&S exist strictly for getting your bits. I prefer the fruit and veg shop Fruitalicious for everything else. It gets the coveted FishForce5 Star award for sexiness and reasonably-priced-goods-iness.

I'm just blabbering now. Loopy Lorna's is also awesome. That gets the Fishforce5 Star award for mind-warpingly-attractive-staff-iness (and lovely tea and food).

Toodle-pip.