...Nothin, yeah, nothin at all....

Guess how many fish I caught today?

Guess how many fish Shaun caught today?

Guess how many fish Tom caught today?

Guess how many fish Roy caught today? No, wrong....3.... and Sam caught 2 and so did Charlie.

The day didn't start too well when I woke to rain, not pounding rain, not showers, not even just rain, but that fine drizzle that soaks everything.

Picked up Shaun and set off... a commercial fishery today... certain to catch fish ....and the venue for the up coming Junior Regional Championships which we are running this year...so a chance to suss out he place and decide where to peg for the kids etc.........two birds with one stone.

We arrived to find a car parked on the lane leading to the 102 peg canal complex where we wanted to be. Down at the reception we enquired and were informed that someone had stayed too late last night, got through the automatic barrier and were then faced with the locked second barrier........at which point the first barrier closed behind them!

Enquired politely as to when the lane might be open and were informed that the numpty had phoned to say he was coming to retrieve his car "within the hour". Now you might think that those running a commercial fishery might check that every one was off site before they locked up, or you might think that they would tell the offender to remove the vehicle at 7.30 when the fishery opened, but not a bit of it.

We decided against fishing one of the other 7 lakes because we really did need to check the venue for safety etc for the kids championships and settled for a bacon butty and a coffee while we waited. Well, the smell was so enticing!

As we ate we mused on the situation and Shaun piped up..." You know , if I'd been a dozy sod like that I'd probably turn up, get the car and sod off quick to avoid looking even more stupid. We could be here for hours." So Shaun and I set off to check....sure enough the car was gone.. So....we walked back down the hill and paid our £5 each to fish and received our tokens for the automatic barrier.

We drove back up to the lane....... and lo and behold.....a bloody white van was parked up at the barrier blocking the way. Sam went to look....three blokes who'd stopped to see if they liked the look of the place before going down to pay!!!!!...............So Sam had to use his token to let them through the barrier to turn round, then Tom had to give his token to Sam......and Roy had to give his to Tom and we had to give ours to Roy... and then we had to follow numpty boys back down to the bottom to get another token so we could get through the barrier. That caused a dispute at the reception as to whether we'd paid or not, but eventually it was sorted and off we set.....again!

Needless to say when we got there the other 4 hadn't waited for us, so we got Hobson's Choice on the spots to fish from.

And then we caught nothing.......and it pee'd down all day....and the wind was from the right so the rain blew under the brollies................and the toilets were locked which meant another walk down the hill and back up again.

We jacked it in at 2 o'clock.....the Boss was pleased to see me home early, but seemed to think the fiasco was funny...some people have a warped sense of humour. I mean you wouldn't laugh about some thing like that would you now?

Roll on dinner and then a trip to the pub for a game of crib with D and B.......what's the betting I lose?

Das vidanya moy padruga.