Braille for....

"This stuff will mess you up"

These are the tablets I am no longer taking.

I took the last one I will ever take on Thursday. I feel better in many respects - I'm not biting the heads off my child and husband for no apparent reason, I have slept better, I don't feel like adrenaline is constantly coursing around my body, dizzy spells have stopped and I have lost 4lbs - I suspect it was pure water retention. I feel like I have a little control back in my life.

Clearly, it hasn't changed my other, long standing symptoms - it didn't whilst I was taking them, and it isn't going to now I am off them. That's for a consultant to investigate when I get an appointment...soon, I hope.

I did some research about this particular medication last night. I am not sure whether I should kick myself for not reading up on it sooner. Apart from the NHS website and the company's own website, I found little else on the web that would indicate much positive to say about it. Instead, lots of research and articles about extreme side effects, most of which I have experienced from within 48 hours of starting the stuff. It's little wonder that I have been finding things difficult to cope with.

So, control back for me. At least without the unwelcome additional side effects I can maybe manage my symptoms a little better in the short term. It hasn't been a good day with regards to that, but a bit of positivity has pushed me through and I have still managed to be pretty productive overall.

So, the colour that returned yesterday has remained. Mostly.

In other news - James had an argument with the back of a chair. The chair won. James has a fat lip and quite a nasty split inside the top lip. He's being a man about it though. Ice cream has helped enormously. Surprise!