Boxes
They talk, don't they, about people breaking down, of things coming apart at the seams. 'Compartmentalisation' is seen, for the most part, as a bad thing. It would seem that being whole, undivided, and not rendered asunder, is the optimal state.
Never fear*, I'm not telegraphing some imminent collapse or breakdown, here, but just wondering if sometimes the saner approach is to actually separate things out, to accept that you need to be different people at different times, under differing circumstances. I mean, surely it's just plain weird to be the same person at work and play?
But maybe for the most part, those different versions of us are similar enough, sufficiently congruent, that there is no concern about some multiple personality disorder. Perhaps it doesn't occur to us that we are a variety of people living under one roof because those people are all family.
Of late, though, I've been aware of the different hats I wear and the need to be aware of who I'm being at different times. No, not so much be aware of as accept that I'm required to be different people in these various circumstances. It's not a new thing, it just seems to be coming a slightly more extreme thing.
So, today, I went up to Oxenholme and welcomed the Canadians (see Tuesday) to Cumbria, which was stunningly beautiful yesterday but a mess of grey mist and rain, today. We talked business and money and stocks and shares and, yes, I enjoyed myself.
And yet, later in the day, enjoying a drink with my friend, Chris, I felt more myself. Writing this, now, I think that's the 'real' me, I just can't quite get my head around it all.
But all this self-indulgent agonising apart, my favourite thing today came from Dan. Monday to Saturday, this week, he's appearing in 'Chicago' at school. When he arrived home, tonight, he revealed that he'd lost at the "50p game", which I'd never heard of. It turns out that the cast have a game whereby the challenge is to pass a 50p coin to another member of the cast without the audience noticing. When you get the 50p, you need to pass it on. I bloody love that, whichever hat I'm wearing.
*Unless in shark-infested waters
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Reading: 'Tin Man' finished. I can’t tell you how much I loved this; a beautiful story and subtly wonderful writing. A very top end 5. I'm hugely grateful to Claire for sharing it with me (a book swap). Next book will be David Clayton’s ‘Manchester Stories’ but I'll need to sleep on this one first.
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