Slide Away

Dear O'H dear and Lovely Tea Jenny,

I went to Kitty Cat’s for a drink this evening. She was at a 40th birthday party last Friday night which was held in the Birthday Girl’s house. It was a very posh do with catering and butlers but BG (in her understandable excitement) had started early and may have been a bit tipsy by the time her guests arrived.

Kitty Cat and a doctor friend were chatting in the hall when a person landed with a thud next to them. From above. Everyone knows that drunk people are invincible and have superpowers, and BG decided that walking was a very dull way to get down stairs. Sliding down the bannister seemed much more exciting. And indeed it was, because unfortunately, one of her superpowers wasn’t balance, and she toppled over the bannister.

“It was lucky she was so hammered,” said Kitty Cat, “because she fell like a rag doll. She just picked herself up and said ‘Oops’”.

Kitty Cat (a nurse) and her doctor friend, who had also had a couple of light refreshments, did their duty and checked BG over. The doctor, an ENT (ear, nose and throat) surgeon and was happy that BG was unscathed...“It’s ok, her nose looks absolutely fine,” he offered as reassurance!

Moral of the story - you are never too old to need a stair gate. Pissed people won’t be able to get it open, thus eliminating the ever present risk of anyone doing their best lemming impression.

C

PS Thank you so much for my amazing parcel. That’s my weekend sorted! You are such a star.