For Mum

It’s twenty years since our mum died.  My brother busboy and his daughter Sarah went to the crematorium this morning in Kirkcaldy to leave flowers and see the book of remembrance.  Bb and I bought some flowers here to have in the house.  Does it get easier as times passes?  Is it more difficult when it’s big number?  Twenty feels heavy and I feel it in my chest.  I wish my mum were here and I could have a cup of tea and a blether with her.  I’m grateful that I’m not an only child though and have my brother to share the memories with and keep them alive - mum would like that and to know that we chat often, get on well and look out for each other and that he has a good partner in D.  She would be so proud to see Sarah now, 33 and married with a family of her own and see how well she’s doing and the good job that she and Martin are doing in bringing up the kids. She loved Bb from the start and I know she'd be happy that he and I are a good team.  Our family has had its ups and downs and challenges, like most families, but it's good to remember the things we have and value.  I’ve kept myself busy all day, but now give myself a little time to think and shed a tear as I write this.