Valerian

Grace and Baldrick fell asleep soon after taking a valerian pill, sleeping through most of the fireworks and bangers. This herbal really does seem to relax them very efficiently. 
I slept only five hours last night which might account for my negative mood. I can see no painless solutions to the current wars, nor can I see an end to our own family conflict.
I feel impotent. 
I have decided to give up, let go of the hope of ever seeing three of my grandchildren again. 
Most of our friends are dead and gone. I miss them. The grandchildren had filled that gap so well.
Tomorrow will be a good day. I will go for a long walk even if my knee still hurts and it's raining, to regain a little control even though I am aware that I don't control anything at all. I still have free will. Or do I?