'Knot' something you see every day

So at half six this morning I got up to pee, got back into bed and then spent the next eighty minutes silently crying because I couldn't move my head. Pure agony. I woke Nick up and was sobbing as it wasn't getting any better and we needed to be getting ready to come back home but I couldn't even sit up, let alone get showered and dressed!

Twelve hours later and it still hurts a lot. Not to the extent that it was but it's still incredibly tensed up and painful and I can't tilt my head any which way apart from to the left. Helpful.

I've had a shower which didn't help, Nurofen hasn't eased it, I ate a banana (I bloody hate bananas so this was a desperate attempt at helping myself), Nick tried massaging it before we left (he didn't get very far as I couldn't take the pain, cue me asking how the hell I'm meant to deal with childbirth one day when I can't deal with this), I've been trying to massage it myself the whole way back to Canterbury but it's not easing it. The pressure has caused a headache on top of the knot so I'm at a loss.

Do any of you have tips for me? Not mad keen on getting a massage, I would love a professional one but the idea of being half naked with a total stranger probably wouldn't relax me too much.

Any foods? Particular heat packs? Massage oils for home? Please help! I'm dreading trying to sleep with this tonight =(