First day failure

Oh god oh god oh god what a nightmare!

Work wasn't too bad. Not quite what I was expecting. The people are lovely. The work doesn't really look to hard but juggling the family is!

Was at the nursery gates at 8am this morning. P went in fine, A cried as soon as I handed him over. I just wanted to snatch him back, grab P and run back home.

My mum picked them up this afternoon. For some reason nursery thought it was good idea to get A to sleep just 25 mins before pick up time. He was then woken when my mum arrived and wouldn't sleep again all afternoon! He was understandably very grizzly for the rest of the day. Poor nana.

When I got home his eyes were so red, he was exhausted. Trying to get them both down for an early night but P has gone into full on kicking and screaming meltdown mode. I didn't think it would effect her much but I think she's a bit confused by the situation too. It's been harder on her than I had anticipated.

I'm sat here listening to Mr J trying to calm her down whilst I feed A. I'm in tears. I don't want go to work again tomorrow. I want to stay home with my babies, where I'm supposed to be