....nothing else can save me, S.O.S......

The Boss bought a bottle of this last night.....Morse code wine....I'll leave you to work out what sort it is.

No work today............really swollen foot....but a day of sleep, rest, painkilers and anti-inflammatories have begun to reverse the condition and I'll be back tomorrow. I may have to wear trainers if I still can't get my shoes on, but at least I'll be there.

This afternoon I had a bit of a barney with a certain car company. I drive a "pretty view" (It's cryptic....work it out) made by a French company. On Saturday the automatic window on the drivers door stopped working. Shaun told me that it is a fault with that model and there was a recall out on them. So I phoned the local dealer today...."Oh no sir there's no recall"...."Well how is it that there is a web forum about this problem and lots of people claim that their car was recalled....and your own website has a FAQ about this problem? "...... Ah well Sir, there is a problem with the motors for the windows...but there's no recall because it's not a safety issue...we did recall some when the problem first appeared, but there is no general recall because as I say it's not a safety problem"....Ah, I understand...you did recall them...then when you realised how enormous the problem was you cancelled the recall.....to save money, because I bet your company doesn't make the motors, you buy them in!"......."Splutter, splutter...er... um ....er...as I say Sir there is no recall but we can repair the vehicle for you.".........."Free of charge?"....."Er...not if the vehicle is out of warranty Sir...if that's the case we will pay 68% of the repair and you will make a contribution of 32%"....."And how much is that?"....."Er...£155 Sir"....So let me get this right, there's a fault on my car, you know about it, it hasn't been caused by me, it has been caused by you fitting a faulty part...but it's going to cost me £155 to get it put right?...."Er , well yes Sir , but that is only 32%!...."And potentially it could happen to all my windows, so that would be a total of £620 to put right....your cock up!"....."Would you like it doing this week Sir, I can manage Thursday at 11.00"...."I don't like it at all but it will have to be done, so you will manage it at 8.00 on Thursday..unless you think I should take time off work and lose pay as well as having to pay thirty bloody two percent!!!"..."Right Sir, Thursday at 8.00 it is...er, we may need to keep it overnight if we have to order the parts Sir".... No you bloody won't have to keep it overnight, today is Monday, now go and count how many cars are booked in for this before mine, then check how many motors you have in store and if you're not going to have one to do my job on Thursday bloody order one tomorrow!!!"

That's more or less the gist of it...although bloody might not have been the exact word I used. It could only happen in this country!

Das vidanya moy padruga.