Silly Season

Dear O'H dear and Lovely Tea Jenny,

The Prince and I were meeting friends today for a Christmas jumpers lunch in Hunters Stables in St Boswells. I have a particularly tasteless one with flashing lights. One of these (motion sensored) lights is rather unfortunately placed right in the middle of my left lady lump. The light on the right side is about an inch higher which led to speculation that my boobs were either different ages or that one was gravity defying. It was a brilliant afternoon full of great food, giggles and free flowing wine.

I thought I had done a relatively good job of pretending to be sober when I got home until I was reminded by The Mini Princesses that I was showing them a new top which I described as ‘foxy’ (it’s not, but that’s beside the point).

Youngest Mini Princess explained that it was disturbing to hear me describe anything in such a way, so I pointed out that if The Prince hadn’t found me foxy, then neither of them would be here.

Note to self: Do not communicate with offspring when under the alcohol induced delusion that I am the funniest person on the planet.

C