2021 Friday — Year’s End

For years this has been a significant day in our household. Fifty-three years ago this evening at 6:15 our daughter was born. That changed the chemistry of this date for this family.

Today our daughter is 53. Impossible! Especially since I think of myself as 22 or maybe 36 (except of course when I wake-up in the morning or when I move furniture or bend down to retrieve something from the floor).

Up until recently, we have not been in touch with our daughter (approximately for the past 4+ years). Something, we don’t know what, went wrong when she was living with us back in 2015-2017.

In 2012 our daughter left her husband and two adult children. They did not get a divorce for a number of years, and our son-in-law tried harder than most to put the marriage back together, but she just never was ready to return.

She had two part time jobs and a cute little apartment of her own until one of the jobs ended in 2015. It was then that she moved-in with us into our big (2800 sq ft) house. The house was two-story and had a very private resort backyard with an over-sized pool. We were gone every other weekend and all summer to our coast house. But she was obviously “unsettled” and at moments very unhappy.

When she had been with us for 18 months we started discussing the need, or maybe it was a desire, to sell the house. That was a distinct trail marker in her relationship with us.

She stayed with us a total of 28 months (rent free; she cleaned the house in lieu of rent and that was her idea). Her furniture was with us for 29 months. The “moving-out” moment was most unpleasant. When her grandmother died several months later our daughter became very ugly and accusatory of how her dad (Mr. Fun) had cared for his mom. The details are unpleasant to say the least. So 4+ years of silence.

She has recently been in touch because she is concerned about her dad’s health. So Internet communication has been happening. She has been quite polite. She is having health issues of her own.

She recently had a kidney removed because it was causing her lots of pain. She refused to let her doctor do a needle biopsy, which was probably good. Pathology revealed that the kidney was cancerous, but according to the doctor the cancer was all contained in the kidney. So she is now recovering and struggling with some very painful days and the doctor has given her more time off from work (she is a teacher’s aide at an elementary school working with children who are mentally challenged).

We are hoping to continually, and probably slowly, rebuild our relationship with her. We’ll see how this develops as 2022 unfolds.

Oh, the photo is the grandfather’s clock Mr. Fun’s grandfather built (story about it some other day). My goal was to capture a photo at exactly 6:15. Close, I was close, but missed it slightly because Mr. Fun’s phone rang, and I was putting dinner on the table. Thankfully a moment later I remembered to click my phone’s camera.

Happy New Year’s Eve
from Southern California,
Rosie (& Mr. Fun), aka Carol
and Chloe & Mitzi too!