Littoral

By MReid

Spring Will Come

If you look closely, you can just about see the shoots of snowdrops on the riverside starting to grow.  It was such a sign of hope in this dark time.  

Another night of broken sleep, particularly as I'd decided to forego the sleeping tablet.  I was so tired, I was sure I'd drop off.  Alas no, but at least I got some sleep but not much.

I spent a good deal of the morning contacting people.  I'd tried to contact DH's boss on Saturday, but there was no answer.  I phoned him just after 9, and he was on his way to work.  One of the nicest guys he knew, he said about DH.  And was there anything he could do, and if I needed to talk, just phone.  He'll send the news down the food chain, so to speak.  I told him my concerns, and he'll see what he can do and get back in touch.

Then the hospital to start the death certificate process.

Then one of DH's friends from work, who had already heard.

Then instead of making another phone call, I decided to go out in the cold showers to the solicitors who hold our wills.  I don't know if it's worth talking to them but it couldn't hurt.  As it so happens, the receptionist used to work for DH, and he'd knit her partner a gansey.  If I remember correctly, the partner was really chuffed with it.

The visit to the solicitors' office served several purposes - it got me out of the house, it got me some exercise, and it gave me an opportunity to take some pics.  My photomojo isn't there really, but once I started I was o.k.

Spent most of the afternoon lying on the bed, hoping to drop off.  It didn't happen, but it was restful and warm.  Read the hospital booklet in more detail, but it was a bit overwhelming.  Then notifying more people via WhatsApp, FB, and Ravelry.

I can feel I'm moving from shock and disbelief mode to weepy mode.  Which is good.  Trying to keep to a schedule, keeping warm, drinking enough, eating even if I don't feel like it, getting physical activity  - all things I figured out and have since been recommended to do.  That and the paperwork are my primary focus, even though the paperwork might prove a bit overwhelming in my current state.

I've been writing everything down since Friday afternoon, when I sensed it would be important to make notes of things.  This has blossomed into several other documents.  It takes a lot of time, but it's a distraction (much like these recent long blip posts!), which is much needed.

And I won't forego the tablet tonight.  I am really ready for a good night's sleep.  More people to notify tomorrow.

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