Seagull

I’ve always liked this song - the original by Bad Company and an excellent cover by Joe Bonamassa - but I’ve always harboured a strong dislike for the bird itself.
Mainly because of things like this. When I went to go out in the car this morning, I first had to wipe a load of bird sh*t off the windscreen and bonnet. I can’t definitely pin that lot on seagulls as we are a reasonable way inland here in Kendal. Having cleaned the car, I set off for Barrow. A place where the seagulls seem to outnumber the human population. A place where most cars have a liberal sprinkling of guano on them.
I’ve been lucky up to now and not had my car used for target practice, but this was the sight that greeted me when I returned to it after going for a coffee up in the town. It looks deliberate and it looks like it was at least a three bird bombing run!! So, for the second time today, I’ve had to wipe down the roof, windscreen and bonnet. If the splatter had been more widespread I’d have ended up damn near cleaning the whole car. So now the car is a blotchy mess of muddy bits and wiped bits, and I will need to wait until the muddy bits join up again, to get it looking all the same colour. “Or why not wash it properly, so it’s all the same, clean colour” I hear you cry. Because it’s winter, it’s wet, the roads are filthy and I don’t wish to expend unnecessary energy cleaning something that will just get sh*t up again in very short order. That is why.
Things are moving again on the house front. Blinds and curtain poles are now scheduled for Friday afternoon and the electrician is coming tomorrow. But the bad news is that the plumber has disappeared to Tenerife for a fortnight - and I need him next Thursday! Mind you, it’s usually one of his lads who does our work so I’ll try contacting the office and see if we can sort something out.